Freak Show

So we are officially a little over a month into the first semester. We had a snow week last week, just like the awful ice storm of last year, and once again, it triggered my cutting.

I mean this year was much better. I wasn’t alone, I hadn’t lost an entire friend group in a few days. I wasn’t depressed. I also couldn’t stop. They don’t lie when they say this is an addiction. I was 85 days clean and I just threw all of that away. Worse is no one has noticed, again. I mean I don’t want them to, but I still feel like they should have. I don’t know. It’s complicated.

Set It Off and As It Is are coming to Nashville next week, so Katie and I are going to see them. I’m so so excited. I’m keeping my hopes up for The Cab to pass through here again. I want to see them more than anything.

Of Mice and Men also announced another tour after the Hunting Party Tour was cut unexpectedly (Linkin Park’s lead singer broke his ankle and had to have surgery). Me and Sarah are going to see them in April. Our tickets are already bought. I’m so freaking excited.

On top of all of that, Paramore is coming to Memphis on my birthday, so I get to go see them. I’m totally making up for all of the concerts I’ll miss next semester. It’s going to be the hardest semester of my college career and I’m just not ready.

I do think that Set It Off is touring again in the fall. That’ll be the only one.

On a totally change of pace, I can’t seem to let the past go. I want to hit her every time I see her. I still care and she doesn’t. I don’t know how to let go. I’m trying. I promise I am trying.

But I can’t.

Love,

J

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